Qaybir joly saltqa qatysty әldebir baghdarlamalargha shaqyrylghanymdy da, ne sebepti qatyspay bas tartqanymdy da jazyp edim... Instagramdaghy Sәken bauyrymyzdyng (әnshi Sәken Mayghaziyevti aitady - red.) túsau keskeni jayly viydeosyndaghy pikirlerdi oqy-y-yp...  Viydeoda balanyng túsauy artynan kesilgen eken. Bilmestik shyghar. "Artynan kes" degen dauys anyq estiledi. Sәken sony oryndaghan tek qana. Áytpese, o zaman da bú zaman, balanyng túsauyn eshkim artynan kespegen! Qazaq balasynyng joly ashylsyn dep - aldynan, qadamy qayshylanbasyn dep qayshymen emes (qayshyda eki jýz bar) - ótkir pyshaqpen, jýrisi shiraq bolsyn dep úl balany auyl-aymaghyna eleuli - er-azamatqa, qyz balany jýrisi jyldam, qimyly shapshang pysyq kelinshekke (túrmys qúrmaghan qyzgha emes!!!) kestirgen eken. Mening bir nәrsege, apam aitpaqshy, sholaq miym jetpeydi. Keshegi "saptyayaqqa as qúiyp, sabyna qarauyl qoyghan" Kenes Odaghy kezinde ózining dәstýr-saltynan onshalyq alshaq ketip, qatelese qoymaghan qazaqty Tәuelsizdik alghan keyingi jiyrma jylda ne qara basyp jýr? Túsaudy artynan kesedi degen "danyshpandar" qaydan shyqty? Nege dýmsheler shygharghan dýnie tez taraydy? Osydan qazaqtyng útary bar ma? Qazaq qazaqtyng qazynasyna ie boludyng ornyna búrmalaytyny qalay? Tipti bazbireuler: "Qariyalardy qoyyp, túsaudy әnshilerge kestire bastadyq", - dep Sәkendi shymshyp ótipti. Qisyn qayda? Balanyng tәi-tәy basqan alghashqy qadamyn ózderi әreng jýrgen, sýiretilip jýrisinen janylghan ata men әje qalay kesedi? Shyndap kelgende shal-kempirge túsau kestiru qazaqta bolmaghan. Qariyalar tek batasyn bergen ghoy... Ary qaray әnshi kese me, suretshi kese me, tipti otyrghan jerin dumangha bólep, "ózi jarqyrap, ainalasyn jadyratyp jýretin" traktorshy kese me - ata-ananyng óz qalauy, óz tandauy. Al әlgi bala Sәkendey janashyr, Sәkendey әnshi, Sәkendey elgezek, Sәkendey namysshyl bolsa jaman ba? Qazaqtyng yrymy әldeqashan energetikalyq jol tauyp ketkenin, qazaqtyng yrymynyng tek qazaqqa júghysty ekenin apam ýnemi qúlaghyma qúiyp keledi. Áytpese, bilgishsinip te, kósemsip te otyrgham joq. Meniki - týsingenimdi aitu. Ary qaray әrkim ózi bilsin...

Ekinshi bir mәsele - jasy bar, jasamysy bar tanymal adamdardyng jazbasynyng astyna maqtaudy janbyrsha jaudyru. Oipyrym-ay, bireu tipti Sәkenge qaray baghyshtap "úly adam, kesse nesi bar" degenge say pikir qaldyrypty. Pa shirkin! "Úly" degen sózding maghynasyn bile me eken sol? Biz osy oryndy-orynsyz kólgirsip, jaghympazdanyp, jalpaqshesheylenip, el aldynda jýrgen azamattarymyzdy shekten tys dandaysytyp jýrgen joqpyz ba? Osynday maqtau-qolpashtaudy kitap oqityn, sanylauy bar Sәken kóterer! Al oqudan maqúrym basqalary (әnshiler, aqyndar) she? "Shynymen sonday ekenmin" dep senip qalghandary qanshama!

Taghy da apamnyng aitqanyn esime alayynshy. Dәl maghan apamnan asyryp kim aqyl aitushy edi. Qajetke jarar, siz de oqynyz, oqyrman... Apa bylay deydi:

"Ásili, adam maqtau sózge ýirenbegeni jón. Maqtaudy alghash estigen adam birinshi joly qyzaraqtaydy. Ekinshi joly oghan eti ýirenedi. Ýshinshi rette "meni taghy maqtasa eken" dep ishtey tilep otyrady. Tórtinshi joly "qashan meni maqtaydy eken" dep kýtedi. Al besinshisindeeeeee... "Meni nege maqtamaydy" dep renjiydi...".

Zeynep apam (Zeynep Ahmetova - red.) maqtau sózding bәrin "Búl atagha, atanyng arqasy" dep basynan asyryp jiberip, ózi qarapayym qalpynda qaldy. Allagha shýkir, apamnyng arqasynda men de maqtaudan kende emespin. Kýnara estiymin. "Zeynep apamnyng arqasy! Maqtaudyng bәri apama!" - dep basymnan asyryp jiberip, óz qalpymda qaludy ýirenip kelem. Men apa emespin, meniki - úqsap baghu. Menen oramaldy da, basqany da orynsyz talap etetin adamdargha aitarym: kemshiligim jetedi, ony týzep әure bolmaymyn da. Óitkeni, әr adam - ózinshe әlem. Apa jerding betinde bireu ghana, bireu bolyp qalmaq...

Aygýl BOLATHANQYZY

(Jazba avtordyng feysbuktaghy paraqshasynan alyndy).