Berik Jýsip. Kelinning betine oramaldy nege jabady?
- ÚLTTYQ TANYM
Últtyq tanymnyng tas-talqanyn shygharyp, uatyp jiberu ýshin totalitarlyq jýiening tepkisinde ótken jetpis jyl da az uaqyt bolmaghandyghyna ózining salt-dәstýrlerinen kóz jazyp qalghan júrtymyz kuә. Jer betinde ata-babalarynan múralanghan dәstýrli mәdeniyetining zәredey jerin ózgertpeu jolynda basyn bәigege tigetin últtar qanshama? Kerisinshe, últ mýlkine jauapsyz, barynsha salaq qaraytyn eki halyq bolsa, biri – bizding júrt ekenin jasyra almaymyz. Áriyne, búl jýre kele joldan tapqan toray tobyq «qasiyetimiz», әitpese qazaq degen qany taza, jylqy minezdi jaysang halyq bolghan. «Attyng jaly, atannyng qomy» dep jýrgen dәuir-dәurendi nadandyq dep sanaudan tughan sana aqaulyghynyng zardapty saldarynyng biri – osy.
- ÚLTTYQ TANYM
Últtyq tanymnyng tas-talqanyn shygharyp, uatyp jiberu ýshin totalitarlyq jýiening tepkisinde ótken jetpis jyl da az uaqyt bolmaghandyghyna ózining salt-dәstýrlerinen kóz jazyp qalghan júrtymyz kuә. Jer betinde ata-babalarynan múralanghan dәstýrli mәdeniyetining zәredey jerin ózgertpeu jolynda basyn bәigege tigetin últtar qanshama? Kerisinshe, últ mýlkine jauapsyz, barynsha salaq qaraytyn eki halyq bolsa, biri – bizding júrt ekenin jasyra almaymyz. Áriyne, búl jýre kele joldan tapqan toray tobyq «qasiyetimiz», әitpese qazaq degen qany taza, jylqy minezdi jaysang halyq bolghan. «Attyng jaly, atannyng qomy» dep jýrgen dәuir-dәurendi nadandyq dep sanaudan tughan sana aqaulyghynyng zardapty saldarynyng biri – osy.
Dәstýr – qatyp-semip qalghan dogma emes, damyp otyratyn jandy qúbylys. Dese de, orynsyz ózgertulerdi kótere almaytyn óte shynyltyr dýniye. Sondyqtan kónening kez kelgen dýniyesin óz ynghayymyzgha, býgingi jetken bilim-parasatymyzgha layyqtap, zorlap iyip alamyz dep jýrip, qiratyp aluymyz ghajap emes. Ras, songhy uaqytta halqymyzdyng ghasyrlar boyy jasaghan tól mәdeniyeti – tútynghan nanym-senimderi men dәstýrli dýniyetanymyna jýrdim-bardym qaraushylar qatary ólsheusiz ósip otyr. Qazaqta: «Aldyrghan anasynyng qoynyn ashady» degen úlaghat bolghan. Babalar tәlimi men ghaziz analar tәrbiyesin jete bilmeytinder, qasaqana bilgisi kelmeytinder bolashaqta osynyng kebin kiyip jýrmesin deniz.
Men reti kelgende halyq arasyndaghy toy-tomalaq, as-jiyndargha qatysyp jýruge tyrysatyn qazaqtyng birimin. «Estimegen elde kóp» degen emes pe? Qala jaghdayynda jana týsken kelin men kýieu balany qatar túrghyzyp qoyyp, sintizatormen bet ashqangha da kóndik. Omyrauynda emizuli balasy men etekten tartyp túrghan shekesi shoqparday úly bar kelinshekting betin ashqandy da kórdik. Tize berseng qazir múnday soraqylyqtardan kóz asha almaysyz. Key jerlerde kelin týsken kýni betin bir ashyp, eki-ýsh jyldan son, «ýlken toyyn» jasaghanda jәne bir qaytalap jiberetin әdet te bar eken. Osynyng bәri ata-baba saltyn ardaqtaugha tym qyrsyzdyghymyzdyng belgisi emes pe?!
Basqany bylay qoyghanda, qarapayym besik jyryn estimey ósken baqytsyz býldirshinderimiz qanshama? Dalalyq dәstýrde bolashaq azamattyng tәrbiyesining ózegi men negizi alghashynda anasynyng aitqan besik jyrynyng әuenimen sinisti bolmaushy ma edi? Sodan da bolar, bala tәrbiyesining basym bóligimen bizding abzal analarymyz ainalysqan. Tehnogendi ómirsalt múnyng bәrine tejeu salyp, qazir dalalyq dәstýrler tolyq jútyldy. Sonshama baytaq tәlimnen soqa basy sostiyp «qazaq» degen atymyzdyng ghana qalghanyna qynjylasyn. Búl – tayau onjyldyqtardyng jemisi emes, tym úzaq merzimge baghdarlanghan, últtyq dәstýrlerding tamyryna balta shappaq niyettegi jәdigóy «janashyrlardyn» qúrghan tory.
Qazaq qyz balany erekshe qúrmetteu arqyly anany ardaq tútyp, aryna balaudy daghdygha ainaldyrghan halyq. Búl óte erte dәuirlerde, tipti ilkidegi «ana erki» zamanynan da búrynyraq, adam-adam bolyp qalyptasqan este joq eski kýnderden sheru tartqan ýrdis. Antikalyq әdebiyetterde, ejelgi gresiya mifteri men anyzdarynda Týn, Ay, Tan, Kýn – әuelde әiel Qúdaylardyng esimderi bolghandyghy aitylady. Bizding jyl sanauymyzdan ýsh jarym myng jyl búryn dәuirlegen әlemdegi eng kóne dinderding biri, keyin hristian men islam әlemine zor yqpalyn tiygizgen zoroastrizmde su Qúdayynyng aty – Apam-Napam. «Apa» sózi kýni býginge deyin bizding tildik qoldanysymyzda bastapqy mazmún-qalpyn saqtap, әiel zatyna izet bildiruding eng jogharghy jol-joralghysy retinde kýndelikti túrmys-tirshiligimizde әli paydalanylyp keledi. Týrik nәsildes hakas júrty әieldik bastau – Qúday-ana esimin «Altyn Úmay» deydi. Búl kәduilgi «úma» (әielding mýshesi) degen sózden shyqqan. Al, «altyn» degen sóz keyin kele әielder taghatyn әshekey búiymdardyng simvolyna ainalghan.
Hakas halqynda saqtalghan «babanyng kýmis pahany» degen de miftik úghym bar. «Pahan» – qazaqtaghy kәduilgi «baqan» sózimen egiz maghyna beredi. Orystar atalmysh sózdi qylmys әleminde әli kýnge deyin «avtoriytet» dep audaryp jýr. Búl – ata-babalarymyzdyng jaratylys zany turaly óte eski miftik týsinikter jiyntyghy. Tuysqan hakas halqynyng eski anyzdarynda osy «kýmis pahan» men «altyn úma» kezdeskennen song jer betine adam balasynyng úrpaghy kelgendigi turaly aitylady. Múnday tipologiyalyq ortaq motivter Adam-ata men Haua-anagha qatysty islam dini anyzdarynda da kezdesedi. Kóne hakas tilindegi «pahan-baqan» sózi bastapqy maghynasyn joyyp, qúbyla kele kóshpendi halyqtar ýshin qara ýiding shanyraghyn tirep túratyn tireuish qúraldyng atyna ainalyp ketken. Dala mәdeniyetinde kýni keshege deyin bosana almay qinalghan túmsa kelinshekterding qara ýidi qaq jaryp, ortasyna ornatylatyn adal baqangha (pahan) arqan kerip, asylyp tolghatuy býginde asyl maghynasy úmyt bola bastaghanymen tegin yrym-salt emes-tin. Búl da ejeldegi adamzat balasyna ortaq, fallosqa (kýmis pahan – erlerding mýshesi), dýniyeni tirep túrghan qúdiretti kýshke tabynudan qalghan kóne mәdeniyetterding júrnaghy. Keyin kele kýmis sózi (kýmis pahany) – er adamdar paydalanatyn әshekey zattardyng simvoly retinde qalyptasqan. Kýmis әshekeymey baylanysty basqa rәsimderdi bylay qoyghanda, bizding qazaq er-toqym soqqanda tek qana kýmis shege paydalanghan. Búl bólek әngime...
Sonymen... Altaylyqtar úghymynda tómengi dýnie iyesi bolyp sanalatyn Erlik han (Irliyg) da jer-ana degen úghymdy bildiredi. Qazaq shejiresinde tútas taypa nemese bir ruly elding attary әli kýnge sol abyz-analardyng esimimen atalady. Jalpy, adamzat balasy, onyng ishinde kóshpendiler nәsilining býgingi tandaghy miraqory – qazaq júrtynyng tútynghan salt-dәstýrlerining tek-tamyry qaydan, qanday úghym-týsinikterden bastau alatynyn osydan-aq angharugha bolady.
Qazaqta shanyraghyna kelin týskende jasalatyn «betashar» degen qasiyetti yrymdy әuelde aqyndar atqarghan. Áriyne, ol zamandaghy aqyn tiypin býgingi aqyndyq óner ókilderimen shatystyrugha mýldem bolmaydy. Kóne aqyn tiypi ru arasyndaghy dәnekershi qyzmetin atqarghan, eki rudyng kiyelerin jarastyru mindetinde bolghan. Demek, olar jogharghy – әruaqtar dýniyesi men ortanghy – adamdar dýniyesining arasynda baylanys kópir qyzmetin kýsheytken. Keyin búl qyzmetti ónerding basqa týrin tútynushy toptar atqara beretin boldy. Qansha ghasyr ótse de әleumettik oi-pikirding retteushisi, adamzat sanasynyng sәby shaghyndaghy barsha mәselelerding bitimgeri bolghan ilki aqyngha degen sheksiz qúrmet sol qalpynda saqtalyp qalghan. Onyng shet-shepirin býgingi sahnalyq óner týrlerine degen halyqtyng erekshe yqylas-peyilinen de kóru qiyn emes.
Numerologiya dep atalatyn ghylymnyng ýlesindegi «qasiyetti sandar» turaly ilimning de qazaqtyng kelin týsiru dәstýrine qatysy әjeptәuir. Bizding júrtta: «Otyz kýn oiyn, qyryq kýn toyyn» nemese «Qyryq jyl baylyq, qyryq jyl jarlylyq joq» degen túraqty sóz tirkesteri saqtalghan. Qyryq jyl bolsyn, meyli ol qyryq kýn bolsyn, qyryq – qasiyetti san. HIII ghasyrdyng ayaghy men HIV ghasyrdyng basynda ómir sýrgen, Tәurat, Zәbur, Injil, Qúran Kәrimdegi payghambarlardyng ómiri men olardyng bastan keshken oqighalaryn jazghan, oghyz taypasynan shyqqan ghalym Nasreddin Rabghuziyding «Qisas-ul әnbiya» atty әigili enbegindegi «Jer betinen topyraq alu» turaly anyzda: «...Topyraqty Mekke men Tayftyng arasyndaghy Dahna degen jerge qoydy. Alla taghala qayghy dariyasyna әmir qylyp, otyz toghyz jyl qayghy janbyryn jaughyzdy. Taghy bir jyl shattyq janbyryn jaudyrdy... Ákelingen topyraq qyryq jyldan keyin balshyq boldy... Sonymen Adam Áleyhissalamnyng beynesi qyryq jylda jasalyp boldy...» delinedi. Búl jerde qyryq degen qasiyetti san adamnyng jaratyluyna baylanysty aitylyp túr.
Álemdegi eng kólemdi epikalyq shygharma bolyp sanalatyn qyrghyzdyng «Manas» jyryndaghy bas keyipker – Manas batyrdyng jәne qazaq jyrshylarynyng eng kóp jyrlaghan qaharmandyq eposynyng biri – Qobylandy batyrdyng qyryq shorysynyng boluy, qaraqalpaq halqynyng iri epostyq múrasynyng «Qyryq qyz» ataluy, әuliye-shiltender sanynyng da qyryq degen qasiyetti sanmen kýrmeletindigin qanday qaghida-qisynmen týsindiruge bolady? Nemese baqilyq bolghan adam men dýnie didaryna kelgen sәbiyding birining «qyrqyn jasap», ekinshisin «qyrqynan shygharu» rәsimi, qyrqynan shyqqan sәbiydi «qyryq qasyq» sugha shomyldyru, túlpar atty qyryq kýn týnekke salyp jaratu, islamdaghy sofylyq aghym ókilderining qyryq kýn týnekke týsip jýrek tazartulary, «qyzgha qyryq ýiden tyi» sózi men ýiinen qyryq qadam shyqqan adamdy «mýsәfiyr» sanau úghymdarynyng arasynda jipsiz baylanysatyn ortaq bir zandylyqtyng bar ekeninde shýbә joq. Solardyng biri – úzatylar qyzdyng qúrmetine yrghap-jyrghap qyryq kýn toy jasau saltanaty. Áriyne, múnday toylardy shamasy jetken jandar ghana jasaghan jәne ol toylardyng býgingi toylargha ýsh qaynasa da sorpasy qosylmaydy. Baba qazaqtyng toyy aittyru, bel qúda, besik qúda bolu, syrgha salu, qalyng mal beru, úryn baru, qalta qarau, tósek-oryn beru, kit beru, sәlem beru, tórkindeu, t.b. siyaqty býgingi tanda «artyq shyghyn» sanalyp jýrgen atributtargha toly bolatyn. Múnday rәsimder tolyq bolmasa da, jarym-jartylay jasalatyn toylar jәne jasaugha peyildi jekelegen dәstýrshilder qazir de bar. Biraq ol jalpylama ómirsalt emes, jekelegen yrym-salt esebinde ghana.
Adamnyng betin jabu – jaqsy yrym sanalmaghan jәne tirilerge jasalatyn joralghy emes. Baghzy senim men qazaqy rәsim boyynsha óli adamnyng ghana beti jabyluy tiyis. Búl – jalghyz qazaq emes, әlem halyqtary foliklorynan berik oryn alghan salt. Sonday kóne júrttyng biri – Amerika ýndisteri. Olay bolsa, ýndister men qazaqtyng arasynda qanday baylanys bar? Atalmysh yrym-salt býgingi kýnimizge deyin jetip, qanshama úrpaq auyssa da óli rudiyment retinde nege ómirsaltymyzdan qalmay, ilesip kele jatyr?
Ejeldegi «betashar» saltynyng ón boyyna saqtaghan qúpiya mәlimeti men býrkeme deregi osy yrymnyng praktika jýzinde jasaluynda jatsa kerek. Óitkeni, yrym jasalmaghan jerde onyng kýshi de jýzege aspaydy. Birtindep qalalyq dәstýrden qalys qala bastaghanymen, auyl qazaghy beysanaly týrde bolsa da búl mәselelerge әli kýnge óte qatal qaraydy. Mysaly, jana týsken kelinning betin japqan oramaldyng shetine qamshy baylau salty. Kelinning betine jabylghan oramaldyng shetine nege qamshy baylanatyndyghyn býgingining qazaghy týstep-týsindirip bere almaydy. Key jaghdayattarda beysanaly týrde rәsimning ózi saqtalghanymen, onyng mәn-maghynasy bizding júrttyng sanasynan óship ýlgirgen.
Qazaqpen tegi bir, japsarlas jatqan noghay halqy әli kýnge deyin shanyraghyna úl bala kelse qoshqar soyyp, qayys qamshy órimining arasyna sol qoshqardyng «qasa-qamshysyn» qosyp óredi. Sóitip, kónili týsken úl balasy joq janúyagha әlgi qamshyny syigha tartady. Býginde barlyq kepiyet-kiyesinen ajyrap bolghan qamshy – qazaqta tek atqa shabatyn qúral esebinde ghana saqtalyp qalghan. Ata-babalarymyzdyng әiel adamgha qol tiygizbey, әri ketse, tek qamshymen ghana jasqauynda ejelgi adamdardyng tanym-týsinigindegi erlik bastau – fallosqa tabynu yrym-saltynan qalghan tylsym mәn-maghyna bolghan. Nemese jana týsken kelinning ayaghynyng astyna toygha soyylghan qoshqardyng (tarttyrylghan isekting emes. – B.J.) teri bóstegin tóseu, otqa may qúiyp, kelindi soghan tabyndyru, ong jaghy men sol jaghyndaghy demeushi jengelerining bala tumaghan bedeu nemese búryn esik kórgen adam bolmauy, qyzdyng tósek-ornyna syrt adamnyng (qazaqy nauqas, balasyz әiel, t.b.) otyryp qoymauyn qatang qadaghalau siyaqty býginde úmytyla bastaghan yrym-salttar bizding júrtta manyzdy sanalghan jәne ózining kýshin joymaytyn joralghy dep eseptelgen.
Sonymen, jana týsken kelinning betin jaulyq-oramalmen ne ýshin jabady? Búl – ilkidegilerding jana týsken kelinge jasaghan jasandy ólimning (obryadovaya smerti) isharasy. Qazaq júrty atalmysh dәstýrdi Ay astynan ala salghan joq. Babalarymyz qansha ghasyr bederinde elep, ekshep, kýndelikti túrmys-tirshiliginde qoldanyp, búl yrymnyng magiyalyq qasiyetin bilu arqyly, osy rәsimning týbirinde tylsym negiz baryna әbden kóz jetkizgennen keyin ghana tútynghanynda sóz joq. Býginde múny eskidegi adamdardyng nadandyghyna joryghysy keletinder de barshylyq. Ótken ata-babalardyng dәstýr-salttaryn qisyndy-qisynsyz «nadandyqqa» jory saludyng ózi – qas nadandyq!
Tabighat-ananyng qaharly kýshterimen arpalysqanda, aurudyng dauasyn izdegende jasandy ólip-tirilu rәsimin jasau – ejelgi baqsylyq dәstýrde bolghan. Al, alghashqy baqsylardyng әielder arasynan shyqqandyghy tarihy negizi bar shyndyq. Osy inisiasiyany jasau arqyly baqsy tazaryp, qayta týleydi degen senim bolghan jәne jasandy ólim rәsimi barysynda baqsy baqy dýniyeden habar-derek әkeledi-mys. Ilkidegiler әrbir rudyng óz kiyesi, jaqsy-jaman, jaghymdy-jaghymsyz qasiyetteri sol ru ókilining әrbirining boyynda bolatynyna sengen. Qarapayym ómir zany da, qazirgi damyghan ghylym jetistigi de múny onsha teriske shygharmaydy.
Jana týsken kelinmen birge ere keletin óz әuletindegi «jaqsy-jaman, jaghymdy-jaghymsyz» qasiyetter ong ayaghymen attaghan kelinning jana júrtynyng ru kiyelerimen tabysa almay qaluynan qoryqqan bizding ata-babalarymyz rәsmy ólim, yaghny jana týsken kelindi tazartu rәsimin sol ýshin jasaghan. Qazaq dalasynda qyz balagha kelin bolyp týsken jerine ru kiyelerin ózimen birge ala keluge qatang tyiym salynatyny – sondyqtan. «Qoyshynyng tayaghynan, kelinning ayaghynan» degende, qazaq jasandy ólim arqyly jany men tәni tazartylghan kelinning basqan qadamy shanyraqqa «qút» әkeledi dep sengen. Salt boyynsha qyz balanyng boyyndaghy óz ruynyng «jaqsy-jaman» qasiyetteri ósip-óngen әuletining ong bosaghasynda otyrghanda, otyz kýn «oyyn» men qyryq kýn «toyynyn» arasynda «tazaryp», «ólip», jana týsken júrtynda basqa sapa-sipatta «qayta tirilui» tiyis. Óitkeni, ilkidegilerding úghymynda әrbir ru jeke-dara kosmos-әlem. Demek, jana týsken kelinning bir kosmos-dýniyede ólip, tazaryp, kelesi kosmos-dýniyege ótkende jana sapada «qayta tirilui» – ómir zany. Óz júrty úzatylghan qyzyna barghan jerinde «tastay batyp, suday sinudi» tilese, qyzdyng kelin bolyp týsken júrty ayaghy auyrlap «jýkti» kelgen kelinnen kónilderine kip alyp, ony jaqsy yrymgha jorymaghan.
Mine, biz sóz etip otyrghan «betashar» rәsimi óz júrtynda tazaryp, «ólgen» kelindi jana týsken júrtynda «qayta tiriltip alu» prosesin qamtamasyz etetin ejelgi rәsmy amal edi. Betashardaghy iyilip sәlem etu salty – әruaqtar dýniyesi men kózi tiri tuma-tuystaryn kelinmen tanystyru maqsatynda jasalatyn da, betashar sәlemine salynatyn aqshalay, zattay beriletin syilyqtar әruaqtargha berilgen rizashylyq sadaqasy retinde qabyldanyp, betashar rәsimin jasaghan dәnekershi-aqyngha tiyesili bolghan. Al, jana týsken kelinning betin ashatyn dәnekershi-aqyngha qoyylatyn basty talap: onyng kelin týsken rudyng abyroyly adamy boluy jәne moraldyq túrghydaghy qasiyet-qamalynyng berik boluy qatang qaperge alynghan.
Kenester Odaghy túsyndaghy iydeologiyalandyrylghan qasang ghylymy jýie búratana sanalghan ózge últtar tarihyndaghy osynday qúndylyqtardy barynsha zerttegeni sózsiz. Sóitip, búratana sanalghan halyqtardyng tútas salt-dәstýrlerine, etnikalyq erekshelikterine syzat týsiruding tura joly – qala mәdeniyetin siniru arqyly otyryqshy etu men rulyq jýieni joi ekenin tayghanaqtatpay-aq tap basty. Rulyq mýdde jinaqtala kelip últtyq iydeyanyng negizin qalaytynyn bilgen Kenestik jýiening sayasatshylary ru menshigi bolyp sanalatyn Shyghys әielin kónening qúrsauynan «azat» etu iydeyasyn algha tartyp, babalardyng sharapatty saltynan ada etti. Adam balasy ýshin ata-babasynyng saltynan bezinu – adamy tegi men tabighatynan bas tartuymen para-par. Óitkeni, adam tabighaty orynsyz ózgertuler men jasandy jol-jobalardy qabylday almaytyn kýrdeli de, qatal tabighat.
Býgingi shanyraq kóterip jatqan órkeni ósken zamanymyzdyng jastary arasyndaghy aty-jóni joq, sebep-saldary belgisiz ajyrasulardyng astaryna ýnilip, onyng tarihiy-әleumettik tórkin-sebepterin terenirek qarastyratyn kez kelgen tәrizdi. Keyde, kelin týskennen song sol әulette bolyp jatatyn adam aitsa nanghysyz sәtsizdikter men baqytsyzdyqtardy kórgende qayran babalardyng qolmen qoyghanday yrym-salttaryna eriksiz ilanghyng keledi. Sonda qalay, búl qasaqy taghdyr ma, әlde kelin týskende mindetti týrde jasalugha tiyis, adam balasynyng yrqynan tys yrym-salttardyng dúrys jasalmauynan ba? Adam balasy óz tabighatynan bas tartuyna bolatyn shyghar, al, atang men anang kórgen aqiqattan qashyp qútylu mýmkin emes.
Asyly, búlaq-bastaularymyzdan alystamaghanymyz abzal!
Berik Jýsipov, foliklortanushy
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