QÚSMÚRYN QÚRYGhY: KEBENEK KIYIP KETKENDER
...Ýsh aida bir keletin qysqa uaqyttaghy kezdesu men alty aida bir keletin úzaq merzimdegi (ýsh tәulikke deyin beriledi) kezdesuden airylyp, “bostandyqpen” tek hat arqyly ghana habarlasyp jýrgenime de bir jyldan asyp ketti. Shynymdy aitsam, tughan-tuystyng jóni bólek eken. Tym bolmasa jarty saghat kezdesip, jýzderin kóru - arman. Meni qoyshy, kóppen kórgen úly toy demekshi, anashymnyng auyldaghy jaghdayyn oilap ketsem, jýregim birtýrli syzdap qoya beretindi shyghardy. Jastyq shaqta densaulyqtyng qadirin bilmeydi ekenbiz, jýrekting sol jaqta ornalasqanyn endi ghana bayqap qalghandaymyn. Sportpen ainalysqannyng qadirin jaqynda bolghan bir “qaqtyghysta” bayqap qaldym. Degenmen, ókpem sәl syr bere bastaghangha úqsaydy, basqasynyng bәri de orynda .
Úighyr “әkәm” sózinde túryp, “nólevoy” brigadasyn alyp bergen. Endi kez kelgen uaqytta jilzona men promzonany kezip jýre beremin. Zonanyng qojayyny Shlychkovqa oiyp jasaghan shahmatty silaghan kórinedi (onday ónerding baryn ózim de bayqamaghan ekenmin). Zona demeseng , syrttan esh aiyrmashylyghy joq. Jýrip túru erkindigi degen qanday keremet ekendigin endi ghana úqqandaymyn.
Kópten qolym jete almay jýrgen kezdesuding de sәti týsti. Auyldan Qayyrghazy agham, irgedegi Arqalyqtan Túrsyngýl apayym kelgen eken. Jezdem Ghabit pen apayym Qaraghandydaghy medinstitutaryn oidaghyday ayaqtap Arqalyq qalasyna qyzmetke ornalasypty. Jas mamandargha ýsh bólmeli pәteri men “podiemnyilaryn” da bergenge úqsaydy. Jalpy jaghdaylary jaman emes eken. Jezdemdi kirgizbepti de ol syrtta tosyp qalypty. Diyrektorlyqtan shygharyp tastaghan ýlken agham Oralghazyny da bir kolhozgha diyrektordyng orynbasary qyzmetine qoyypty. Bayan apayym da Semeydegi medinstitutyn tamamdap, anamnyng janyna - Maqanshygha dәriger bolyp barypty. Kәkeng Qarabúta auylyndaghy sovhozgha bas injener bolyp ornalasypty. Tayaqtyng eki úshy baryn búrynnan da biletinmin, degenmen, ekinshi úshynyng zardaby sәl-pәl bolsa da azayghangha úqsaydy. Anamnyng tóte jazumen jazyp jibergen hatyn oqyp, mәz meyram boldym. Otyryp alyp hatyna jauabymdy onynan solyna qaray iyrelendete jóneldim.
Túrsyngýl apayym neshe týrli tamaq jasap әlek. Mynda ash jýrmegenimdi jetkizuding ózi qiyngha soghyp, kónili qalmasyn degen oimen shúqyp-shúqyp qoyamyn. Qaydan bilsin, adamnyng kónili tolsa, tamaq degening de batpay qalatynyn.
Sóitken ýsh tәuligim zyryldap óte shyqty. Anamnyng hatyndaghy “Átten, әkeng erterek attanyp ketti, sen erte qoldan shyghyp kettin”,-dep jazghan joldarynyng bayybyna keshkisin oilanyp jatyp әreng jettim. Sóitsem, 1978 jyly apaylarymnyng ýlkeni Qaraghandygha, ekinshisi Semeyge, mening Almatygha oqugha týskenimizdi menzegeni eken ghoy. Olar ana ýmitin aqtap, oqularyn oidaghyday ayaqtap, maman atanyp, túrmys qúryp ýlgerdi. Mening “zek” atanyp , jatqan jerim mynau.
Pavlodardyng on birinshi zonasynan etappen Hasen degen jerlesim kelgen eken. Auyldasym, menen bes jas ýlkendigi bar. Shayyn, temekisin aparyp berdim. “Semeynikterim ” semeylik Asqar men óskemendik Bolat, jezqazghandyq Suyinshibay әrkimining óz otryadtarynda prohodtary bar. Kileng bokserler men kýresker sportsmender. Olargha erip men de kópten úmyt bolyp bara jatqan jattyghuymdy qolyma alyp әrtýrli qimyldar jasap qoyatyn boldym. Qanshama jyl at ýstinde jýrgen Suyinshibaydyng jasyna qarap, Jaratushymyzdyng boyyna silaghan erekshe kýshine tanghalmasyma bolmady. Bilek kýshimen oghan osy zonada teng keletin eshkim joq. Qol kýrestiruden eshkimdi aldyna salmaydy. Bostandyqta jýrgen kezinde jylqyny uyirimen sonau jambyldyng Sarysuynan aidaghannan Reseyding kórshiles Tómenine (Tumen) quyp aparady eken. Sol jerden kelisilgen aqshalaryn alyp, auyldaryna qaytatyn әkki “konokrad” bolypty. Eki jeti boyy at ýstine ózderin tanyp tastap jorta beretin ol - bir joryqtarynda qolgha týsip, segiz jylyn ótep jatqan jayy bar.
Asqar bolsa bokspen ainalysyp jýrip, bir keshte tóbeleske aralasyp qata tiymese de, bata tiyip bireulerdi mertiktirip , sportpen qosh aitysyp, óz ómiri men taghdyryna bayqamay balta shauyp alghan kórinedi. Bolat túiyqtau, syryn ashyp aita bermeydi. Ebin tauyp bir sóiletip alsang kópke deyin toqtamay qoyatyny taghy bar. Al "balamut" deuge bolmaydy. Jastayynan jetim ósken jigitting ómirge degen qúshtarlyghyn tilmen jetkizu mýmkin emes. Qanday sәtterde bolmasyn ylghy kóterinki kónil men jaydary “kóktemdi” barshamyzgha silap jýrgeni. Qolynan kelmeytini joq, zonanyng barlyq janalyqtaryn jarnamasyz-aq sonyng auzynan estiymiz. Syrtpen baylanysy jaqsy, qyzyl jaghalylardyng da tilderin tez tauyp ala qoyady.
“Rejimnikter men operativnikterdin” maghan qúryp jýrgen túzaqtary da bar siyaqty. Onyng alghashqysyn promzonada bayqadym. Týski tamaqqa otryadpen kirgeli túrghan kezimizde leytenent (laqap aty "chaban") aldymdy kópe kórineu kes-kestep, jaqynda ghana aldyrtqan malaqayymdy basymnan júlyp aldy. Ondaydy mýlde kýtpegen edim. Malaqayyma úmtyla bergenim sol edi, malaqayymdy ong qolymen artyna tyghyp, sol qolymen jaghama jarmasa ketti. Jaghamdaghy qolyn ajyratugha úmtylghanymda ong qolyndaghy malaqayymdy joghary kóterip laqtyryp jibergeni. Ózimdi ústay almay qaldym ba, әlde ynghayy kelip qaldy ma, ong qolymdy sәl týsirip kýresting “bedro” әdisine salyp, perip kep jiberdim. Eki ayaghy aspannan kelip, “jalp” ete týsti. Ondaydy menen kýtpese kerek jalma jan atyp túryp, jan dauysy shyghyp, birdenelerin aityp jatyr. Oghan qaraytyn mende de hal joq edi. Jerde jatqan malaqayymdy qaghyp - qaghyp “chabangha” bir qaradym da jýre berdim. "Toqta", "toqta" degennen basqa onyng sharasy da qalmaghan siyaqty. Týski tamaqqa jinalghandardyng aldyndaghy búl kórinisting arty jaqsylyqqa aparmasy barshamyzgha mәlim bolatyn. Eki kýn jilzonagha shyqpay, promzonadaghy bendujkalardy panaladym. Ýshinshi kýni jilzonagha ótip bara jatqanymda toqtatyp, birden “shizogha” on bes kýnge kete bardym. Ol on bes kýnimning ýstine on bes kýn qosylyp, bir ay zonanyng ishindegi zonany da kórip qaytu búiyrghan edi. Asty betonnan jasalghan kameranyng qabyrghasynda kýndiz temir shynjyrmen qabyrghagha qabysa jabysatyn kereuetten basqa eshnәrse joq. Bir kýn “zaletnyi” bir kýn “proletnyi”. Bir kýn ýsh uaqyt asqazan aldaytyn tamaghyn bergenimen, ekinshi kýni sudan basqa nәr tatqyzbaydy. Qysqasy , zonanyng tәrtibin búzghandardy tәubәsine týsiruge arnalghan oryn. Oghan moyymaghandardy alty ailyq “bur” kýtedi. Ony әrkim әrqalay qabyldap, әrqalay tuyin jasap jatady.
Aydyng songhy kýni ystyghym kóterilip, birtýrli kýy keshtim. Kameradaghy jastau jigitpen tang atqansha kýresting kóp tәsilderin ýiretip, terlep tepship bir “otrabotka” jasap alyp, “bostandyqqa” shyghyp bara jattym. Semeynikterim týgeldey kelip, barlyghy densaulyq pen jaghdayymdy súrastyryp, birden monshagha alyp bardy. Búndaghy (jazylmaghan) ishki dәstýrge say qarsy alyp jatyr. Monshadan keyin bәrin janadan kiyip aldym. “Melustinnen” tigilgen kәstóm shalbar men taza bylgharydan jasattyrghan tóplii túp tura ózime shaq bolyp shyqty. Mol dastarhannyng basyndaghy әngime -dýkennen keyin, kelip - ketip jatqan jigitterding kóniline masayray, shizodaghy bir aidyng bir kýndey bolmay, “shәy kóterimdey” uaqyt bolyp qala beretinine tanqalyp, Eynshteynning salystyrmaly teoriyasy esime týsip, uaqyt pen kenistikti biraz sharlap qaytyppyn.
Kýnder de osyndaghy “kenistikke” sәikes bayau ótip jatty. Aqyrghy kezde keshkisin ystyghym kóterilip, ayaghym tobyqtan tómen ózgeniki siyaqty, tabanym týsip qalghanday әserde bolyp jýrgenin semeyniygim Hasenge aitsam: “Qoyshy sen, meni qúlaqtan teppey-aq qoy”,-dep qaperine alar emes. Osy joly da kórshi lokalkadaghy jigitting tughan kýnin toylatyp qaytayyq dep qolqa salyp bolmady. Zonada atap ótiletin, toylaytyn negizi tughan kýn merekesi men bostandyqqa shyghu “provod” qana. Ol endi eki mynday adam otyrghan jerde jii kezdesetin dýnie ekenin ózderiniz de bilip otyrghan bolarsyzdar. Degenmen, osy joly bas tartugha tura kelip, erterek úiyqtap qalghan edim. Týnde terlep jatqan jerimnen oyandym. Astymdaghy matras su bolyp ketken. Áytse de tandy birdene qylyp atyrugha tura keldi. Ertesinde tanghy astan keyin jilzonany aralap shyqtym. Densaulyghymda esh kinәrat joq siyaqty. Kesh bata taghy bastaldy. Týnde túryp matrasty auystyrugha tura keldi. Kýndiz esh nәrse bolmaghanday taghy tayrandap ketemin. Týsinsem bolmasyn. Ýshinshi kýni týnde oyanyp ketsem, jan terge týsip jatyr ekenmin. Ýsti basym malmanday su. Bilegimdi jalanashtap jibersem, janbyrly kýngi aghashtyng bútaghynan tamghan jauynnyng tamshysynday ... Óz kózime ózim senbey, sýlgimmen sýrtip qarasam, iyghymnan tómen sorghalaghan ter shyntaghymnan tamshylap túr. Tanerteng dәrigerge baryp bolghan jaydy bayandap bersem, senbey shygharyp saldy. Ertesinde erkek dәrigerge barlyq jaydy jayyp saldym. Analiyzimdi erterek әkelip tapsyryp, dәrigerlik “praktikasynda” búndaymen kezdespegenin aityp, basyn shayqap shygharyp saldy. Analizdi alyp barsam, keshegidey emes, anany-mynany aityp shygharyp salmaq oiy bar. Ashudy at qyp minip, qolymdaghy qútyny laqtyryp, úzyn korridordyng ekinshi jaq shetindegi terezeni shaqqanymda ghana zonanyng medisina basshysy kapitan kensesinen atyp shyqty. Onsyz da kinәsizden kinәsiz bas bostandyghymnan airylghanymdy , endi densaulyghymdy alatyn bolsa, esh nәrsening meni toqtata almaytynyn aityp órekpidim. Dereu jatqyzyndar, analiyzin tolyqtay alyndar degen “komandadan” keyin ghana baryp, meni qabyldady.
Týnine ýsh ret matras auystyrylyp, týrli dәri dәrmekterin iship, ukoldaryn alsam da “at arysa -tulaq, er arysa -aruaq “ degendey, qyryq tórt kelige biraq týstim. Zonanyng kiyimimen , qolym kisende audandyq auruhanagha- Qúsmúryngha aparyp rentgenge de týsirtip kelgen. “Volyamen” ishtey qoshtasyp, janymdaghy jigitten bir tal temeki súrap alyp, qúshyrlana shektim. Orys әielden súrasam, aitargha jauaby joq. “Diagnozymdy” bir jetidey boldy taba alatyn emes. Kýndiz dalagha shyghyp, lokalkanyng syrtyndaghy ómirge qyzygha bir qarap alyp, ishke ilbip enemin. Birinen keyin biri kelip jatqan jigitterge shyghugha da zauqym joq. Mynanday mýsәpir jayym men jaghdayymdy eshkimge kórsetkim de kelmeydi. Ishtey barshasymen qoshtasyp:
-Shirkin, volyagha bes-on minutqa shygharyp, qolyma besatar tiyse, әlgi әkki shalgha birinshi oqty joldap, songhysyn ózime júmsar edim,-dep Jaratqannymyzdan jalbarynyp súrap ta qoyamyn. Auyl aimaq, tughan-tuys, bota- taylaqtyng barlyghy kóz aldyma bir-birden kelip, kinonyng “lentasynday” ótip jatyr, ótip jatyr ...Qay jerde ýziletini tek bir Allagha ghana ayan.
Otyz tórtten Qadyr ( zonanyng pahany bolghan) jerlesimizding semeyniygi on ýsh jyl otyrghan Tólegen degen jigitting etappen kelgenin estigen bolatynmyn. Sol kelip túr degen song eki jigit qoltyghymnan demep dalagha alyp shyqty. Temir tor lokalkanyng ar jaghynan kelgen jinishke jigitting qolyn alyp amandastym. Janyndaghylar ózimizding zonanyng “vesovoy” jigitteri. Qadyrdyng sәlemin jetkizip, birden әngimege kóshti.
-Bauyrym, men sening auruyndy bilemin. Osydan ólesing nemese jazylyp ketesing dep janyndaghy jigitting qaltasynan shygharyp jatqan shólmegin qolyna alyp, asyqpay auzyn asha bastady. Bayqaghanym, kәduelgi “russkaya vodka”. Ekinshi bireuining qolynan “hozyayskiy krujkany “ shygharyp lyqyldatyp qúya bastady. Betimen bet qylyp toltyrghanynda shólmekting týbinde ýshten biri ghana qaldy. Al, bauyrym, sheshim ózinnen bolsyn,-dep ústata berdi. Mening qolyn qaytarugha amalym da qalmaghan bolatyn. Bismillәmdi aityp, tereng bir dem aldym da, jútyp jatyrmyn, jútyp jatyrmyn bitetin týri joq, toqtamastan ne bolsa ol bolsyn,- dep bitirdim-au, әiteuir. Qaytaryp bergen krujkama qalghanyn qúidy da, "sening densaulyghyng ýshin",-dep qotara saldy. Jigitter onsyz da ayaghymdy әreng alyp jýrgen meni qoltyghymnan demep әkelip, kereuetime jatqyzdy. Bes minuttay jatqannan keyin býkil denem ishime qúrt kirip ketkendey jybyrlay jóneldi. Barmaqtarymnyng basy men aqyrghy kezde onsha kóp bar-joghyn bayqamay jýrgen baqaylarymnyng úshy jybyrlap qoya berdi. Tәtti qytyqtyng lәzzatyna batyp, úiyqtap ketkenimdi bayqamay da qalyppyn. Sizderge - ótirik, maghan - shyn , tәnerteng atyp túryp, tayqúlynday shapqylap kettim. Keshegiden týk qalmaghan. Kýzetshi dәrigerim de senbeydi. Júmysqa kele bastaghan “med.personaldyn” barlyghy mening palatam arqyly ótip jatyr. Tәnirimning osynday siy men jeltoqsannyng keremet qasiyetin kórgennen keyin, kóp nәrsening maghan keyde “týkke túrghysyzday”bolyp kórinetini ras.
Bir jetiden keyin zonanyng ishindegi “krasnyy krestke” auystyrdy. Osynda jatyp Seulde ótken 13 jazghy Olimpiada oiyndaryn teledidardan kóru baqyty búiyrdy. Ýsiphannan keyin Dәuletov Jenisti úmytpasam jiyrmasynshy jeltoqsanda shygharyp salyp, qystyng sony Jana jyldyng aldynda jalghyz ózimdi “sangorodokqa” etapqa shyghardy. «Obshaktyng gruzyn» tiyep alyp, taghy da tukutuk-tuk, tuguduk-tuktatyp Qaraghandygha jettim. Bayqaghanym, etapta qyzyl jaghalylar barlaryn salyp «raskrutkagha» jibermek bolghan eken. Janymdaghy jaqsy jigitterding arqasynda ol oilary iske aspay qaldy. Dolinkasda alys emes edi.
(Jeltoqsan oqighasy. Estelikterden ýzindi)
Qúrmanghazy Rahmetov, jeltoqasanshy
Abai.kz