Esse

HHH

Keyde oilaymyn.. Jaratushyny bar yntasymen shynayy sýigen Gogoli nege osynday ayanyshty taghdyrdy basynan keshti.  Jazushynyng baqytty ómir sýruge tolyq qaqysy bar edi ghoy.  Jany әbden kýizelgen Gogoli ómirining sonynda mynanday maghynadaghy hatty  jazugha mәjbýr boldy:

"Eshtene jayly aitqym kelmeydi. Álemdegi býkil qyzyqtyng bәri suretshining bólmesinde jasalyp jatqan dýniyelerdin  bәrinen de tómen ekeni sonshama, eshtenege de qaraghym kelmeydi. Búl әlem men ýshin jaratylmaghan sekildi" (N.V.Gogoli. Tolyq tomdyq shygharmalar jinaghy. Mәskeu.  Kórkem әdebiyet baspasy.  7- shi tom, 353- shi  bet)

Esse

HHH

Keyde oilaymyn.. Jaratushyny bar yntasymen shynayy sýigen Gogoli nege osynday ayanyshty taghdyrdy basynan keshti.  Jazushynyng baqytty ómir sýruge tolyq qaqysy bar edi ghoy.  Jany әbden kýizelgen Gogoli ómirining sonynda mynanday maghynadaghy hatty  jazugha mәjbýr boldy:

"Eshtene jayly aitqym kelmeydi. Álemdegi býkil qyzyqtyng bәri suretshining bólmesinde jasalyp jatqan dýniyelerdin  bәrinen de tómen ekeni sonshama, eshtenege de qaraghym kelmeydi. Búl әlem men ýshin jaratylmaghan sekildi" (N.V.Gogoli. Tolyq tomdyq shygharmalar jinaghy. Mәskeu.  Kórkem әdebiyet baspasy.  7- shi tom, 353- shi  bet)

Búl jazushynyng suretshi Aleksandr Andreevich Ivanovqa jazghan songhy haty. Hatty oqyghan sayyn, jalanash tәnime bireu múzday su qúiyp jibergendey túla-boyym týrshigedi.  Tәnirim- ay deymin sol kezde, búl - Jaratushyny jan-tәnimen sýigen qúly Gogoliding auyzynan shyghugha tiyis  sóz be edi! Halqyna qaldyrghan songhy ósiyetinde "Óli emes, tiri jan bolyndar. Myna әlemde Ghaysa Payghambar kórsetken esikten basqa esik joq" degendi, aitqan Gogoli emes pe?  Shyn mәnisinde Gogoli qany búzylghan zamanynyng tәninen ýzilip týsken bir týiir taza tamshy edi ghoy.  Óz Otanyn da dәl Gogoli siyaqty  eshkim berile sýie alghan  joq. Mening oiymsha óz halqynyng keleshegi ýshin shynymen  jany ashityn jazushy halqyn әldeqalay  maqtap emes,  Gogoli siyaqty ashyna sýi kerek, ashyna. Halyqtyng jaqsy jaghyn aitu eshqayda qashpaydy, qayta, kerisinshe halqynyng boyyndaghy kelensizdikterdi kýiine, yzalana jazu kerek. Halyqty ynty-shyntymen sýi degenimiz -onyng qúly bolu emes, qayta sol qúldyqtan qútqarugha talpynu. Qara tobyrdyng arasynan belsenip shyghatyn bir-eki sýmelekten qorqyp ýndemey qalu adamnyng azamattyghyna núqsan ghana emes,  ol - halyqqa jasaghan satqyndyghyn. Halyqtyng arqasynan ótirik qaghyp qoyyp, jelinin qaqtap, ony sauyn siyrday sauu - baryp túrghan opasyzdyq.

Bәrimiz de mektepte oqyghan Gogolidin  "Taras Bulibasy"  esinizde shyghar. Eger esinizde bolsa  shygharmanyng sonynda jaudan qashyp jýrgen Taras ózining temeki shegetin trubkasyn týsirip alady ghoy, biraq ony  dúshpannyng jerinde qaldyrmaymyn dep jýrip, aqyr ayaghynda jau qolyna týsedi. Moralidyq túrghydan qarasaq osynday auyr jaghdayda Taras Bulibanyng bir kishkentay trubkagha bola qaytyp baryp,  jaudyng qolyna týsui - qylmys. Qúdaylyq túrghydan  qarasaq búl qylyghynyng arghy jaghynda minez, er-jigitting boyyna Qúday darytqan qas batyrlyq jatyr. Otanyn shyn sýietin, provaslavialyq minez  ruhymen tәrbiyelengen  Taras Bulibanyng kózine, trubkasyn jaudyng jerinde qaldyryp ketuding ózi satqyndyq bolyp kórinip túr. Otanyna jasaghan satqyndyghy ýshin eki úlynyng bireuin óz qolymen óltirgen, tughan jerining tәuelsizdigi ýshin kýresken bir úlyn jaulardyng qalay azaptap óltirgenin óz kózimen kórgen Taras Bulibanyng basqasha jasauy mýmkin emes-ti.   Otangha jasalatyn satqyndyqtyn, ýlkeni, kishisi bolmaydy. Satqyndyqtyng bir-aq aty bar. Ol - azghyndyq.

Ásirese shygharmanyng sonynda jaular Taras Bulibany ústap alyp,  aghashqa baylap, tiridey otqa órtegende, jany alqymynyng úshyna kelgen  ol «ne saytandar, aldyndar ma... Uaqyty kelgende sender shyn mәnisindegi orystyng provoslaviyelik dinining ne ekendigin tanityn bolasyndar»  dep, dúshpandaryna ses kórsete aighaylaydy.

Taras Bulibanyng búl sózderi shyndyghyna kelgende jazushynyng -ómirlik ústanymy bolatyn. Adamdy myna dýniyede ústap  túrghan bir-aq nәrse bar.  Ol - Qúdaygha degen senim. Sol senim joghalghan kýni adam adamshylyghynan aiyrylyp, hayuannyng kebin kiyedi.

Dese de ózining senimine  ómir-boyy berik bolghan Gogoliding jany nege, nelikten tym qúrysa bir sәtke bolsa da bayyz tappady? Onyng sebebi - biz ómir sýrip jatqan  dýniyening sanasyn saytan biylep alghan edi.  Gogoli adam sanasyndaghy әli búzylmaghan jalghyz taza talshyq edi. Sol sebepten de saytany qoghamda Gogoliding jany tiridey tozaqqa týsip, sanada qalghan bir ghana taza talshyqty bylghau ýshin, saytannyng neshe týrli aila-amaldary iske qosyldy. Solardyng eng soraqysy jәne ýreylisi - jazushynyng aqyl-esi auysqan degen qanqu sózderding taratyluy bolatyn. Qoghamnyng oidan shygharyp, jazushygha taqqan osy bir  ótirik diagnozy Gogolige auyr soqqy bolyp tiydi de, onyng jan-dýniyesin jelqayyqtay   shayqap jiberdi.

Qogham ózderi oilap tapqan  ótirikti aqyr ayaghynda op-onay shyndyqqa ainaldyryp, ayaghyna mingizdi de jiberdi.  Basqasyn bylay qoyghanda, bilimdi, danyshpan dep jýrgen Belinskiyding ózi órekpip osy sózdi aityp túrsa, qoldan jasaghan ótirikke qalghan júrtty sendirtu onsha qiyngha týspedi.  Shynayy bolmysyn tanudan ólerdey qoryqqan orys qoghamy búl ótirikke quana-quana qosyldy. Endi Gogoliding ózi de ómir sýrgisi kelmedi.  Eger aqyl-esinen auysqan qogham, sau adamgha  "jyndy" degen diagnoz qoysa, odan keyin ómir sýruding qanday maghynasy bar? Qúdayshylyghynyzdy aitynyzshy, qanday?

- Bәri de, kózimshe maghan  jyndy dep aityp,  aqyl-esi auysqan adamdardyng týrli dәri-dәrmekterin úsyna bastady. Al, osy kenesti berip jýrgen aqyldy adamdardyng bәrining de bir auyzdan mening kitabymda eshqanday janalyq joq, bәri jalghan deui meni onan sayyn qayghynyng tenizine batyrdy. Búl adamdardyng maghan jasaghan eng auyr  qatigezdigi....  Men qatelesuim mýmkin, bәlkim adasqan da shygharmyn, adamnyng bәri jalghan bolghandyqtan olardyng týsinigine sәikes ótirik aitqan shygharmyn: biraq mening jýregim men janymnan aqtarylyp týsken dýniyelerding bәrin de jalghan deu -qatigezdik, -dep, jazdy ol, ómirining sonynda.

Tәni emes, jany ystyq tabada shyjghyrghan, myna jalghan tirshilikten týnilgen Gogoli endi óluge bel budy.  Búl Gogoliding ómirindegi eng ýlken qateligi bolatyn. Qara tobyrdyng aitqanyna ókpelep, ólgisi kelgen Gogoli osylaysha saytannyng túzaghyna ilindi. Ómirining sonynda jazushy shyn Qúdaydy sýigen azattyghynan airylyp, Matvey әkeyding aitqanynan shygha almay qaldy. Saytan osylaysha Gogoliding azattyqty sýietin janyna noqtasyn saldy. Ruhsyz jandardy erkindikte ústaytyn saytan ruhy myqtylardy, qansha yshqynsa da raqym oilap jibermeydi. Ruhsyzdar qayyrghan malday saytangha ózderi qaytyp oralady.  Óz zamandastarynyng ishinde Qúdaygha eng alghash adamnyng kózimen qaraghan Gogoli múny qalay týsinbedi eken?  Óz degenine jetken saytan, sәbiyding kirshiksiz jýregindey Gogoliding taza janyn qylqyndyrugha  kiristi. Osylaysha ne isterin bilmey jany qysylghan Gogoli auyr qylmysqa baryp, 1852 jyly graf A. P. Tolstoydyng ýiinde Matvey әkeyding azghyruymen ózining "Óli jandar" poemasynyng ekinshi kitabyn otqa jaghyp jiberdi...

...Qayran, Gogoli! Janym-au, ne istep qoydyng sen, ne istep qoydyn! «Óli jandar" otqa órtenip ketpegende mýmkin әlemning әdebiyeti búdan da biyik shyngha kóteriler me edi? Saytannyng býkil shyndyghyn kórip, odan shoshynghan adamzat balasy basqa jolgha týser me edi? Mýmkin, orys imperiyasy basqa elderge tyrnaghyn batyrmay, ghasyrdyng basynda sypyrylyp ketken halqymyzdyn  shyn maghynasyndaghy ziyalylarynyng taghdyry saytannyng bir oghyna baylanyp ketpey, aman qalar ma edi? Qúdaydy shyn jýregimen sýydi ýirengen  músylman men hristian әlemi bir-birine dәl býgingidey óshpendikpen qaramay, qayta dos-bauyr sekildi ómir sýrer me edi?...  Áriyne, múnyng bәri endi qaytyp oryndalmaytyn - mening mәngilik armanym. Mýmkin "Óli jandar" poemasynyng ekinshi kitabyn otqa jaghu arqyly Gogoli, mening qiyalymdaghy,  oryndaluy yqtimal úly armanymnyng jibin ýzip jibergen shyghar?

Gogoli turaly jazghan әlemning әdebiyettanushylary  jazushynyng osy minezin әli kýnge sheyin  moralidyng kózimen, adam men qoghamnyng arasyndaghy týsinbestik retinde kórsetuge tyrysyp, ony aqtap alghysy keledi. Áriyne múnyng artynda bir izgilikti maqsat ta jatqan shyghar. Biraq, men búghan kelispeymin. Gogolidi múnday jolmen  aqtap alugha bolmaydy. Ghaysa payghambardy shyn jýregimen sýigen Gogoliding ruhy da  mening oiymsha adamzat balasynyn  ózin búlaysha aqtap alghysy kelgenimen kelispes..

Moyyndauymyz kerek, "Óli jandar" poemasynyng ekinshi kitabyn órtep jiberu arqyly, ne isterin bilmegen Gogoli túnghysh ret Qúdaydyng jolynan adasyp qaldy. Jazushynyng boyyna múnday daryn Qúdaydan berildi.  Óner- adamnyng jeke menshigi emes. Óner -halyqtyng iygiligi de emes. Keyde halyqtyng iygiligi ýshin  kәkir-shýkir de jaray beredi. Keyde qara tobyrdyng arasynan shyqqan sholaq belsendiler  -  óner aqynnyng nemese jazushynyng otbasyna nәpaqa kirgizetin dýnie bolghandyqtan, solardyng qazynasy  dep te byljyraydy.  Óner eng aldymen - Qúdaydyng qazynasy. Allanyng nazary týsken adamnyng boyyna ghana  óner daridy.  Qúdaydyng qazynasynyng baghasyn biletin halyq ýshin ghana  -órkeniyetting izgilikti qaqpasy ashylady. Sebebi órkeniyet - Qúdaydyng altyn sarayy. Qúdaydyng qazynasynyng baghasyn bilmeytin halyq - úly jaratushynyng jolynan adasyp, baqytsyzdyqqa úshyraydy.  "Aqynnyng jýregi - Allanyng qazynasy" degendi Múhammed Payghambar beker aitpaghan. Óner adamzat balasyna tartu etken  Qúdaydyng eng asyl syiy.  Halyqtyng arasynan shyqqan qara tobyrgha ókpelep, Qúdaydyng qazynasyn otqa tastaugha qalaysha Gogoliding qoly bardy eken?. Qalaysha?...

Jazushynyng ómirining sonyndaghy jan azabyna ýnilseniz "Óli jandaryn" otqa jaghu arqyly, abaysyzda saytannyng túzaghyna ilinip qalghanyn, Gogolidin  ózining de sezgenin angharasyz. "Óli jandardyn" ekinshi kitabyn óz qolymen otqa jaghyp jibergennen keyin Gogoli týk nәr tatpay, eshkimmen sóilespey, býk týsip jatyp alypty. Jazushygha zorlap tamaq ishkizbek te bolghan, denesine neshe týrli suyq baqa-shayandardy salyp ótirik emdemek te bolghan. Jazushynyng janyna tynyshtyq beruin súraghan jalynyshty ótinishine eshkim de qúlaq aspaghan.

Qogham Gogoliding ólimin tiledi. Saghat týngi on bir kezinde  Gogolidyng jany yshqynyp, aighaylap súraghan eng songhy ótinishi: "Maghan baspaldaq berinizdershi. Men joghary shyqqym keledi" bolypty.

Zamandastarynyng aituynsha, úly jazushynyng qatarynan birneshe kýnder boyy letargiyalyq úiqygha ketip qalatyn ústama auruy bar eken. Ómirining sonynda jazushynyng osy auruy qaytalanghan. Sanasyn saytan iyektegen qogham Gogolidy óldi dep tanyp, letargiyalyq úiqydan oyanyp ketpey túrghanda, tezirek, qara jerding qoynyna tapsyrugha asyqty. Osylay bolaryn aldyn-ala sezgen Gogoli halyqtyng arasynan bir tiri jan tabylatyndyghyna ýmittenip,  1845 jyly mynanday ótinish jazyp ketipti. Búl Gogolidi qogham әli jyndy dep jariyalay  qoymaghan, ólerinen alty jyl búryn jazghan ótinishi-tyn.

"Esimnen tanbay jәne aqylymnan adaspay túrghan kezimde,  songhy ótinishimdi  erterek jazyp ketudi jón sanadym. Mýrdem iyistene bastamayynsha, mening tәnimdi jer qoynyna tapsyrmanyzdar. Múny esterinizge salyp otyrghan sebebim,  auruym ústaghanda ómirlik belgilerim joghalyp, jýregim men tamyrymnyng toqtap qalghan kezderi bolghan". (N.V.Gogoli. Tolyq tomdyq shygharmalar jinaghy. Mәskeu.  Kórkem әdebiyet baspasy.  6- shi tom, 187- shi  bet)

Gogoli Danilov shirkeuining janyna jerlenedi.  Jo, jo, joq. Búlay aituym kýna, shyghar. Orys qoghamy ar-úyatynyng ainasy bolghan, ómirining sonyna sheyin provaslav dinine adal qyzmet etken, Qúdaydy ótirik emes shyn jýregimen sýydi ýiretkisi kelgen  payghambaryn tiridey kómdi.

Gogoliding ólimi elding arasynda týrli әngimeler tughyzdy. Jer qoynyna tapsyrayyn dep jatqanda, tabyttyng ishinde jatyp jazushynyng auyr kýrsingenin estigender de bolypty. Biraq ar-úyatyn tezirek kómgisi kelgen, sanasyna saytan úyalaghandardyng ishinde bir tiri jan tabylmapty. Áriyne, búl sol kezder ýshin shyndyghyna qoghamnyng әli tolyq kózi  jete almaghan,  el arasynda jýrgen qanqu sózder ghana edi.

Biraq búl shyndyqtyng beti kýnderdin-kýninde bәribir ashyluy kerek-tin. Elding arasynda aitylyp jýrgen týrli әngimelerding shyn -ótirigin tekseruding mýmkinshiligi 1931 jyly tudy. Sebebi sol jyly  jazushynyn  sýiegin Novodevichie ziratyna qayta jerleu turaly úigharym jasalynady.

Qúday saqtasyn! Myna súmdyqty qaranyz! Gogoliding sýiegine kórtergeu (eksgumasiya) jasau barysynda kebinining jyrtylyp, tabytynyn  tyrnalyp tastalghany jәne marqúmnyng býk týsip jatqany anyqtalady...

..Nege ekenin bilmeymin, Reseyding sanasyndaghy saytany qaytadan qozyp, Qazaqstannyng tәuelsizdigin qyzghanyp, Alladan búiyrghan jerine kózining súghyn qadap sandyryqtap jatqan myna alasapyran zamanda, músylman bola túrsam da, aspannan týsken tórt kiyeli kitaptaghy Qúdaydyng ósiyetin dúrys týsingen Ibragiym, Ghaysa, Músa.. Múhhamed payghambarlar sekildi -Jaratushyny jýregimen sýy arqyly  adamzat balasyn tabystyrudy múrat etkenine bola  azap keshken Gogolidi o dýniyege tiridey jibergen orys halqy ýshin keshirim súrap, pravoslaviyelik shirkeuge baryp bir shyraq jaqqym kelip  ketedi. Bәlkim mening en  sýiikti jazushymnyng aruaghy - shyn niyetpen jaghylatyn sol bir shyraqtyng januyn kýtip, mazasyzdanyp jatqan shyghar. Sol shyraqty jaqqanym ýshin meyirimi mol Alla-Taghala  bir tilegimdi oryndasa, myna qatigez  әlemde ne isterin bilmey jalghyzsyraghan, ózimning kishkentay últymnyng keleshegi ýshin - Resey sekildi aidahar elderding sanasyn qaytadan saytan túmandandyrmauyn súrar edim.

Janyng jannatta, núryng peyishte shalqysyn, Nikolay Vasiliyúly!. Men de sen siyaqty, týptin-týbinde myna jalghan tirshilikte meyirimdilikting jenetinine senemin. Sebebi adam balasy jaryq әlemge kelgende - eng aldymen onyng janyna  Allanyng núry shashyraghan.

Oqyrmannan keshirim ótinip, eng aldymen orys jazushysy bolghannan keyin, óz uaqytynda orys qoghamynyng ýlken qylmys jasaghany turaly ashy shyndyqty eng birinshilerding biri bolyp surettegen  aqyn Andrey Voznesenskiyding "Pohorony Gogolya Nikolaya Vasilicha" atty ólenin, jazushynyng aruaghy razy bolsyn dep, ózining tól tilinde tolyq bergendi jón sanadym.

Vy jivoga nesly po strane!

Gogoli byl v letargicheskom sne.

Gogoli dumal v grobu na spiyne:

"Kak donositsya dojdi cherez kryshu,

otpevanie neyasnoe slyshu,

ponimai, chto eto menya.

 

Vy vokrug menya vstaly v koliso,

nabludaya, s kakou kruchinoy

pogrujaetsya nos moy v liso,

tochno lezvie v noj perochinnyi.

 

Razve ya nekrofiyl? Eto vy!

Lubyat pohorony vitiiy,

pominait, kogda mertvy

zabyvaya, poka jivye.

 

Ploti hudui y greshnyy moy duh

pod proshalinye plachy volshebnye

zakolachivaete v sunduk,

otpravlyaya nazad, do vostrebovaniya».

 

Letargicheskaya Neva,

letargicheskaya nemota -

pozabyti, kak zvuchat slova.

 

II

 

"Podnimiyte mne veki, sootechestvenniky moiy,

v letargicheskom veke

probudiytesi ot galimatiiy.

Podnimiyte mne vekiy!

Razbudy menya, lud molodoy,

moy knigy chitavshiy pod partoy,

potrudiytesi ponyati, chto so mnoy.

Net, othodyat poparno!

Pod Ufoy zatekaet spina,

pod Odessoy moy razum smerkaetsya.

Vot odna podoshla, ponyala..

Net-smorkaetsya!

Vmesto smeha otkrylsya koshmar.

Mnoy sdelannoe - minimalino.

Mne vpivaetsya v shei komar,

on odin ponimaet.

Greshnyy duh moy bronirovan v ploti,

bezuchastnui kak kameniya.

Pomogy mne podnyatisya, gospodi,

chtob upasti pred toboy na koleniy".

 

Letargicheskaya blagodati,

letargicheskiy balagan -

spati, spati, spati...

 

"Ya vskryval, proletaya, groba

v predrassvetnuy poru,

kak iz skladchatogo griba,

iz krylatky rasseival spory.

 

Jdali v hrustalinyh grobah, kak v struchkah,

Orobelyh sareven goroshiny.

Chto dostignuto? Ya v durakah.

Jizni takaya korotkaya!

 

Jizni skvozi pory nesetsya v verhiy,

s toy je skorostiu iz stakana

isparyaitsya puzyrkiy

nedopitogo mnoi narzana».

 

Kak torjestvenno strashno lejati,

kak bespomoshno znati y jelati,

chto stoit nedopityy stakan!

III

IYz-pod fraka ukrala ispodnee.

Duet v sheli. No v nee ne prosunutisya.

Chto tam muky gospodniye

pered tem, kak v mogiyle prosnutisya!"

Krik podzemnyy glubin ne potryasi.

Dvoe vypily na mogiyle.

Lubyati pohorony, divyasi,

detvora y chinovnichiy klass,

kak vy lubiyte slushati rasskaz,

kak Gogoliya horoniliy.

 

Vskroiyte grob y zastynite v snegu.

Gogoli, skorchasi, lejit na boku.

Vrosshiy nogoti podkladku prorval sapogu.

(Sony)

«Abay-aqparat»